• Cracking the Ice

    Cracking the lacy edge of iced snow with the heel of a boot or shoe is a simple springtime ritual that reminds me of childhood—my own, my children’s, my granddaughter’s. The sun has announced its return to longer days of warming concrete, pavement, earth. There will be lots of melting and all the snow that falls after that these melting days will have a shorter life.

    This morning I watched a small red squirrel struggling for traction on ice under a parked car and felt for its lack of progress. And I laughed, although staying upright while carrying groceries to the back door or garbage out to the trash cans is still a challenge. The universal human experiences of twisting an ankle, ripping pants or landing too hard on the tailbone while innocently walking from one spot to another, can happen in March. My most painful fall of the 2019 – 2020 winter season happened late in March. While untangling the dog’s leash after eleven at night my feet slipped out as I tilted sideways. The wet dog and soaking pjs were immediately fixed. A variety of body aches took longer to go away.

    Sharp claws, sturdy boots, favorite sneakers, clamp on treads don’t guarantee smooth moving on ice. Spring melt produces the fun cracking the edge of snow, but the sneaky clear path across a sidewalk might be wet, or might smack your back end down in seconds. It is a time of year that jetpacks would be helpful. Even if you are deeply isolated from COVID with groceries delivered and others doing your errands, at some point the garbage can has to dragged curbside. As long as the temps stay low and shade covers your steps, ice can take you down.

    For those suffering from what the pandemic brings, at least a moderate winter didn’t add more suffering. Eventually we will be able to stand in our yards, alleys, boulevards and talk to others. We’ll be able to minimize the isolation and exchange stories. In the meantime, there are people out here willing to lend a hand, even if it means a walk across spring ice. Give someone a call. 

  • My New Goal: To Be Insanely Happy

    When we are five, we laugh 113 times a day. By the age of 44, that number shrinks to 11 times a day.

    Those statistics, which I came across in Voice of the Innovator, made me feel sad for my adult self who, now in her early 60s and pretty much isolated due to the pandemic, often laughs even less than that.

    A few days after reading that statistic, I emailed a long-time friend I haven’t seen in years, ending my message with these words: “I hope you are doing well…healthy and happy.”

    He responded immediately with one sentence: “Yes, insanely busy and insanely happy!”

    That simple reply gave me pause.

    Despite having read at least a dozen books on happiness and taken several happiness classes, including Berkeley’s the Science of Happiness and Yale’s The Science of Well-Being, the idea of being insanely happy had never even crossed my mind.

    In fact, happiness, even at a basic level, often felt elusive. And the busier I was, the harder it was to be happy. Instead, I was stressed and anxious, and often heard myself saying, “I don’t have time to be happy now. I just need to get this done.”

    Then my friend Laurie sent me a video clip of an orangutan’s reaction—one might say insanely happy reaction—to a simple magic trick in which a man makes a chestnut disappear. Watching the video made me laugh and provided me with a jolt of jolly. The first time I watched it, the 13th time and even the 21st time.

    And while I’m still not laughing as often as a five-year-old, I’m definitely ha-ha-ing more often in pursuit of my new “insanely happy” goal.

    Just thinking about the video makes me laugh. Perhaps it will do the same for you.

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    3 responses to “My New Goal: To Be Insanely Happy”

    1. Sandra Madeira Avatar

      That was very funny, thanks for sharing 😆

    2. Eliza Waters Avatar

      YouTube is full of laughter-inducing videos, and 2020 made it my go-to site for my daily laughs. Baby goats, laughing babies (infectious!) and yes, the ubiquitous cat and dog videos. The late show hosts are good, too. Laughter is a soul-vitamin! 😀

      1. Bev Bachel Avatar
        Bev Bachel

        Yes! Recently subscribed to YouTube TV and have been watching old episodes of Seinfeld and Mark Twain Award for Humon acceptance speeches. Lots of laughs in those. Plus a walk down memory lane.

  • Life in Reverse

    I’ve never been super orderly or systematic, but for years, filing papers seemed like the responsible thing to do. Before computers and the Internet, you needed hard copies of financial, health, and school records. Digital wasn’t an option. Sometimes the only convenient way to access a how-to lore was to keep a photocopy of it. As part of an office redo, I’ve been sorting, tossing, and shredding old paper files. Although some of what I saved makes sense, a lot of it is baffling. 

    1972 – High school diploma from the pre-digital age when paper was the only valid proof.

    1976  Where’s my college diploma? Good thing I don’t have to prove that anymore.

    1979  Graduate school grade reports. Why?? And inexplicably, grade slips from three management classes my father took.

    1978 – A photocopy of copyright information (pre-Internet). I suspect I hoped to publish something worthy of a copyright. 

    1984-85 – Wedding catering quotes. I truly don’t know why I kept these. Maybe I thought the information would be helpful when my sister married. Years after our wedding, when I rediscovered the file, I kept it for its entertainment value: Miss Lucille’s Catering: hot buffet with two meats, one kind of potato, one vegetable, a salad, and dinner rolls for $4.75 per person. Plus $1.50 for china, silverware and linen service. Despite the reasonable prices, we went with another caterer, but I didn’t keep that!

    1988 and 1991 – Proposals to work remotely after our sons were born. WAY before corporations were flexible with working mothers. I outlined a plan to return to full-time work after my maternity leave. I would work mornings at home and afternoons in the office for several months. I’m still surprised and grateful I got to do it. Twice.

    1992 – Landscape plans for our old house. We haven’t lived there for 5+ years. Why’d I keep them? Maybe because I put a ton of sweat and love into those gardens, a passion that developed after our second son was born in 1991. Gardening was a creative outlet that didn’t require a babysitter.

    1995  2006 – Vendor contracts and confidentiality agreements. I was in business from 1992 – 2010, but either companies didn’t require agreements or I quit saving them.

    2005 – Records from breast biopsy #2 and #3 – stereotactic then excisional. I don’t know why I kept the details from this painful time. Maybe to remind myself how lucky I’d been?

    2008 – Adjunct teaching contract from St. Thomas University’s Master of Business Communications program. One class, one semester: $4050. Even then, it wasn’t much money.

    2013 – Yellowed copy of a Star Tribune review of an anthology in which I had an essay.

    This ephemera maps some of what I thought was valuable, but I wasn’t saving the right stuff.

    The real treasures are the snapshots from the 1920s and 1940s tucked in with some of my mother’s Medicare records. I also found four thin files of family history written by my parents, sister, and me. 

    My grandma and grandpa. I’m guessing from their big smiles, he
    was returning from WWI. On the porch is my great grandma, a woman I never met.

    If only my file drawers held more of what’s precious—my parents’ belief in education. The hopeful start of my parents’ and grandparents’ loving marriages. Irreplaceable stories about immigrant ancestors. 

    My parents’ wedding in 1944 during WWII–Aunt Corinne, Mom, Dad, Grandma & Grandpa
    (also shown above).

    , , , , ,

    12 responses to “Life in Reverse”

    1. Ann Coleman Avatar

      I love finding old family stuff!

      1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

        Yes! And for me it was also the surprise of it–what were those photos doing in the Medicare folder?!? Why would I have Dad’s grade reports??

    2. Bev Bachel Avatar

      I love all the things you’ve turned up…so many are similar to the things I’ve saved…and am now parting with. Letting go is hard but I keep thinking of something Cathy Madison told me years ago…throw your anchor in front rather than dragging it behind.

      1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

        I like that idea — throw your anchor in front of you instead of dragging it behind. A lot of what I found were old creative samples–work I was proud of and was sentimental about. I had to age it a little before I could toss it. It’s been weird for me to come to terms with the idea that there will be little tangible trace of the work I spent so much time on. But that’s the way it goes when creative is your product.

    3. Pam Avatar
      Pam

      What a lovely collection of odd and likely treasures. Each says a different thing about how lifespans are marked. Just wonderful!

      1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

        Thanks! I bet your drawers would also have interesting treasures.

    4. Eliza Waters Avatar

      Our timelines are so similar, Ellen. College ’76, married in ’84 ($7/meal for the caterer!). First son ’88, second in early ’92.
      Isn’t it funny what we save, so important at the time!
      I treasure the old photos of the ancestors, too. My niece recently started a private family FB page, so we could share old photos and memories. My parents and grandparents we the same generation as yours. It is fun to look back, though I still miss them all. What is disturbing is that we are now the eldest generation, yikes!

      1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

        Funny how similar our timelines are. If I lived closer, I’d come see your garden! 😉

        1. Eliza Waters Avatar

          Wouldn’t that be nice! If the day ever comes when life returns to ‘normal’ and you find yourself out East, definitely come visit!

    5. Johanna Meulendyke Avatar
      Johanna Meulendyke

      Awww. Memories are very important. I am glad the memories you identify are good ones.

      1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

        It was fun to see my Mom’s mother looking so girlish and happy!


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