What’s Your Approach?

Earlier this month, I celebrated the 8th anniversary of my retirement at 61. Occasionally, I have floundered, but I’m happy with the shape it’s taken. Many of my friends are retired or nearing it, and I’ve observed a range of philosophies:

Nonretirement – For several writers and artists I know, retirement looks like slowing down, not quitting. They have fewer paid jobs but they’re still working. Or they have a big project underway which might be published or shown later. 

No schedule, no plans – Some people prefer the freedom to choose their activities day by day. For years they were yoked to a commute and an office. They feel they’ve paid their dues and earned the right to do whatever appeals to them on any given day. They hate the idea being locked into a schedule and resist planning too far ahead. I’ve noticed more men choosing this style.

A bit of structure – These retirees prefer several days of planned activities but want lots of free time, too. Their schedule might include workouts or sports, socializing with friends, and weekly volunteer gigs. They also value unscheduled time and are careful not to pile too many events into one day. This approach often appeals to women. I belong to this camp.

Always busy – This group is eager to do everything. All the time. For as long as possible. While the first three groups like to travel, these retirees travel even more. They’re adventuresome and willing to try whatever looks fun, which could be a class, a biking/hiking/kayaking group, a tour or whatever. They’re an enthusiastic bunch and want to be sure they do it all before time runs out.

Aimless – Some people struggle with retirement because they miss the structure work provided (even though they resented the job at times). They don’t know what to do with themselves. With so much free time, their days can feel empty. They have trouble getting projects accomplished because there’s always tomorrow.

Not loving it – Some retirees really don’t like retirement. Often, they are accomplished people who were well-respected in their field. Work provided focus and was integral to their identity. Retirement feels like a loss. The activities they try are pleasant but feel like make-work—time-fillers. They want their pursuits to be meaningful and have purpose, but they haven’t found fulfilling interests yet.

Combo – A person new to retirement may sample several approaches before finding a satisfying mix. Shifting away from paid work can be as confusing and life-changing as starting a career. Many times, people aren’t sure what they want or what will feel like time well-spent.

So much of a person’s approach to retirement depends on their temperament. What do they value most—freedom, balance, drive, accomplishment? Are they self-motivated or do they need outside structure in their days? 

What has worked for you? Or how do you envision your future retirement?

80. Feels like 90.

We were planning to have dinner outside and listen to a musical group. Should be an ideal evening with temps in the very low 80s. Even the mosquitos have called a partial truce. One bad apple in the perfect plan is humidity which is making 80 feel like 90. The second bad apple is a gradual lowering of Canadian wildfire smoke into Wisconsin’s Northern zones.  Iced tea will melt quickly, clothes will stick, and someone will begin coughing or wheezing. 

The morning was excellent after a rough bunch of storms and rain cleaned out the atmosphere last night. Walking on a nearly empty beach at ten this morning with bright blue sky and sparkling water felt like a summer dream. The toddler with us, spending her first days of walking into very shallow Lake Michigan waters, celebrated with digging in the sand, pouring water on anything, jumping tiny waves with help from adults. Two hours for summer 2023 memories.

That’s how the whole season has played out—like slurping a slug of pickle brine from your glass of lemonade. Do you dump the drink, try to add something in hopes of a more enjoyable beverage, or accept the situation?

Or is the pickle brine just an emotional reminder of the true state of the bigger world—global warming and the U.S. state of unrest? Keeping to a summer theme is challenging and heading to dinner out with music in the background, even in sauna-like conditions could provide relief from week’s tensions.

Then the heavens opened. Rain lashed against windows. Wind whipped flowers and trees. Thunder rumbled over the bay waters. Power went out at the restaurant. So, we ate leftovers at our kitchen table, talking and laughing at what the toddler was trying to say. Temperatures dropped to low 70s as storms disappeared. The gift of a typical summer experience. No pickle brine in the last of the lemonade.