Shhhhhh. I’m Quietly Quitting. Are You?

Walking 10,000 steps a day.

Dining out.

Shopping in stores.

Drinking alcohol.

Volunteering.

Going to see plays and movies.

Attending meetings.

Visiting my aunt in her care facility.

These are just some of the things that I’ve quietly quit since the start of COVID. Some because I worried about succumbing to the virus. Others for a variety of reasons. For instance, I stopped walking because of hip pain and stopped drinking alcohol because I was overindulging in my quest to find the perfect tequila.

Surprisingly, at least to me, I even came close to quitting phone calls, in part because so many people suggested turning those calls into video calls, which was inconvenient to my stay-at-home self who was taking fewer showers and not worrying about styling my overgrown hair. Heck, somedays I wasn’t even getting out of my PJs.

Many of my friends and colleagues have been quietly quitting as well. Some because of their health or the health of a loved one. Some because driving has become more challenging due to failing eyesight. Others because they’ve retired and now spend more time traveling or with their grandkids.

However, I didn’t realize we were “quietly quitting” until just a few weeks ago when I came across several articles about China’s young workers, many of whom are making it clear that they—unlike previous generations, including mine and that of my fellow Word Sisters—are not willing to work themselves to the bone.

Instead, many are “lying flat” by doing the bare minimum to get by. For some that means refusing to work extra hours. For others it means forgoing a job altogether. For still others it means not getting married or having children.

While most of my quits have felt like a natural evolution from the years in which I often put others’ priorities ahead of my own, I recently realized my pendulum has swung too far and although I am still not venturing out much, I am once again spending time with family and friends, volunteering and even traveling. 

How about you? Have you been quietly (or even loudly) quitting? If so, what have you quit? And perhaps more importantly, have you found new ways to engage? If so, please share.

Meditation on Autumn Equinox

Long before a turning point is evident, tiny shifts lead to change: The last cut of the axe before a tree falls, the gathering force of an avalanche before it lets go, the final few cells piling up to a clot that blocks flow and becomes the stroke, the gradual loosening of a sleepy child’s fingers before the toy slides to the floor, the droop and dangle of a leaf before it drops, the new insight added to insight as a mind is changed. 

At autumn equinox, a near balance is struck when day and night are almost the same length before the northern hemisphere tilts toward winter. Minutes of daylight have been slipping away since June, and September’s days, though still sunny, are cooler. I don’t welcome the coming darkness, but accept it. And autumn has its compensations: apples, fires, and glorious colors.

In Honor of the Queen

One person has been a responsible adult with a warm hearth throughout most of our lives: Queen Elizabeth II. Hearing of her death made the world feel partially unmoored.

For some of us she looked like our moms or grandmas wearing hats, purses, gloves, glasses and curled hair through the 50s, 60s, and 70s. Then customs changed and women dropped most of those signs of feminine civility while the Queen carried on. That was comfort in her colorful ensembles. She wasn’t a perfect human, but that didn’t matter when she appeared or spoke. 

The British have been fortunate to have a person who committed herself to national service be part of their tradition without needing to be part of the fray. She carried knowledge of world leaders and traditions from studying and influencing behind the scenes. Everyone could look to her to be calm and strong during the worst of times. She adapted through war and peace, civil unrest, financial disruption, cultural changes. When she missed the right step, she accepted counsel and spoke to her fellow Brits about what she had learned. Around the world we all felt as if there was one adult in the room. 

God rest Queen Elizabeth II. There are probably many beyond England’s shores who wish it was possible to pop over the ocean to set a thank you note at the castle gate.