Thoughts on the Urge to Purge

Loads of articles encourage retirees to declutter our possessions and purge decades of accumulation. My generation is repeatedly reminded our kids won’t want our stuff. True. They’ll want it after we’ve given it away. Or never. 

Purging sounds so virtuous.

The philosophy of decluttering or purging goes like this—discard what you don’t need. Pare down your belonging to the essentials. Ideally, give your stuff to someone who can use it. The process is also supposed to offer emotional benefits:

  • Get rid of what weighs you down—the boxes full of old files, the clothes that don’t fit, the shopping mistakes. Let go of the emotional weight of caring for all these things. The sense of responsibility and guilt are bad for you. 
  • Think how light and refreshed you’ll feel when you have less stuff. Less to take care of. A clean slate. (Who the heck even knows what a slate is? Well OK, I do. It’s a personal chalkboard students did schoolwork on. I have one in my office closet that belonged to my grandfather. I’m not even that attached to it. Would a history museum want this artifact? Probably not, since my brother crayoned on it.)

The decisions and matchmaking are what short circuit the urge to purge. 

Neighborhood Buy Nothing groups make it easier. You feel good about the matchmaking. The groups are well suited to offloading housewares and furnishings you no longer use. When we got a king bed, someone wanted our queen size mattress and bed frame. All I had to do was snap a photo and post the items. The neighbor who wants your stuff picks it up. No more loading up the car for a trip to Goodwill and driving bags and boxes around for weeks until you do the drop-off. No more staging a tedious garage sale only to find you still have to dispose of what didn’t sell.

Local Buy Nothing groups do a brisk trade in kids’ clothing, toys and equipment. I recently acquired a second booster seat for family dinners and I often scan posts for age-appropriate toys. My granddaughters’ wardrobes are supplemented with barely-worn-before-they’re-outgrown clothes and shoes from active Buy Nothing groups. The amount and quality of free stuff is astonishing. 

People of my generation used to take things to Goodwill or similar charitable organizations. Sometimes I still do—mostly clothes. Recently, an energetic friend’s clean sweep inspired me to pack up a load of clothes and old purses I don’t use. Won’t use. I do feel a bit virtuous. 

But right now, I’d like to purge any additional demands to declutter. Unload all those reminders and the associated guilt. It’s yet another thing that would be good for me . . . that I don’t feel like doing. Besides, the slate doesn’t take up much room in my closet.

Comments

9 responses to “Thoughts on the Urge to Purge”

  1. Bev Bachel Avatar
    Bev Bachel

    Loved your take. I offloaded a box of jigsaw puzzles and misc housewares this morning and have already filled another box this afternoon. This one with art and office supplies. Feels good … but neverending.

    1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

      I’ve got yet another pile to give away . . . maybe it will actually leave the house next week . . . 😆

  2. Eliza Waters Avatar

    You expressed the feeling well…. pressure to purge, emotions connected with it, and some virtuosity for accomplishing goals. It takes a lot of energy!

    1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

      Thanks! It absolutely happens in widely spaced spurts around here. 😉

  3. Sally Showalter Avatar
    Sally Showalter

    I found it can be liberating. Thank you.

  4. Carole Duff Avatar

    Buy Nothing – now there’s a good idea! Give a penny, take a penny.

    1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

      It feel good to give to someone who wants your stuff 😁

  5. Sally Showalter Avatar
    Sally Showalter

    I am full on with declutter and I do it over and over, only to keep the things I love and use. Otherwise……………………but, I didn’t learn this until my late 50’s, and it still works. Thanks for your good thoughts on the subject.

    1. Ellen Shriner Avatar

      Thanks for reading and sharing your perspective. I think if I’d established a habit like you have, it would be easier.

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