WordSisters

Tag: Guatemala

  • Two Moms, A Sister, and a Boy Scout

    Two Moms, A Sister, and a Boy Scout

    Taking the dental supplies to the clinic through the streets of Anitqua, Guatemala
    Taking the dental supplies to the clinic through the streets of Antiqua

    When Juan Jose was ten, he was dumped in the Brule River not once, but twice when I was at the helm of our canoe. Without help from strangers, we would not have made it to the landing.

    He’s almost 14, and he recently completed a comprehensive water-based safety course that involved practicing self-rescue and rescuing other kayakers with his Boy Scout troop in Lake Superior. These are necessary skills for the wilderness cold water kayaking that he’ll be doing in Alaska with the Scouts this August.

    Juan didn’t join Scouts to learn how to navigate water. He joined Scouts to learn what his two moms and sister couldn’t teach him.

    I became a Cub Scout leader by default. He wouldn’t let me drop him off while I ran errands for an hour.

    Dentist Hugo, Juan Jose, Hygenist
    Dentist Hugo, Juan Jose, Hygienist

    When it was time for him to cross over to Boy Scouts, he decided to stay in scouting. This surprised me. I was preparing myself for a free evening. Instead, I trained to be an assistant Boy Scout leader. He still wasn’t ready for a parent to drop and run.

    Juan was pulling away from me though. I no longer went to all of his campouts. When I did go, he was caught up in the flow of scouts running from one event to another.

    Today, he completed his Eagle Scout project in Guatemala. He raised funds for children to receive dental care, and he collected over 130 lbs. of toothbrushes, toothpaste, floss and dental supplies .

    Juan gave the children sunglasses so they wouldn't be blinded by the light. That's how it is done at his dentist in Richfield.
    Juan gave the children sunglasses so they wouldn’t be blinded by the light. That’s how it is done at his dentist in Richfield.

    The money he raised enabled 14 dental cleanings, 34 extractions, 31 fillings, and 28 sealants. Care that these children would not have received otherwise.

    He gave one suitcase of dental supplies to the dentist and a suitcase of toothbrushes, toothpaste, and floss to De Familia a Familia. This organization is a link between birth and adoptive families. They have over 260 families that they are currently working with.

    Juan couldn’t have done this project without help from relatives, friends, neighbors, and strangers.

    And, his two moms and sister.

    Six teeth extracted and a dental cleaning.
    Six teeth extracted and a dental cleaning.

    Because of all of us, he’s learned to navigate waters and to pull himself back into his kayak.

    Thank you.

  • The Birth of Juan Jose’

    The Birth of Juan Jose’

    Juan Jose' and Crystel
    Juan Jose’ and Crystel

    The best part of Antonio’s name change was when Crystel stood up in the courtroom and said, “I want each of you to tell me something you like about me.” She stood confidently, her hand resting on the bar that divided the gallery from the well of the courtroom. She faced the nine people, including Antonio, who came to support his name change. Aunts, Uncles, Antonio and his girlfriend, were sitting with their back against the wall. She pointed to her Aunt Kathy. “Start there.”

    This surprised and delighted me. She was asking for what she needed. And, in this moment what she needed was to know that she was as important as Antonio who within minutes would legally be named Juan Jose’.

    She didn’t share his need to change her name. Her Guatemalan birth mother had told her that she named her Crystel.

     

    Waiting for the judge.
    Waiting for the judge.

    The birth search and visit report that Jody and I had done in 2011 when her and Antonio were 9 years old said, Mayra (her birth mom) remembered exactly the date of Crystel’s birth. Most birth mothers do not, not for lack of interest but because dates are usually not important in Guatemala. She named her Crystel Rocio. Crystel because:  “I felt she was a little fragile thing as crystal, and Rocio (dew in English), because as I was walking the day I gave birth to her, it was cloudy and it had rained during the night, and I saw the leaves with drops of dew on them”.

    When Jody and I adopted our children, we felt it was important that we keep the names that they were given at birth. We wanted to honor the birth mothers. At the time we didn’t know what their birth names would be and I fretted if I would be able to pronounce their Guatemalan given names. I refused to name my baby boy even though my social worker said that I could. I didn’t want to give him, one more thing that could be taken away from him. He was already losing his mother.

    IMG_0425A few months later, we received the results of Antonio’s birth search. His birth mom, Rosa, was asked if she named Antonio. She said no, that she wanted to name him Juan Jose’ (Juan to honor her father and Jose’ to honor her grandfather), but the adoption people named him Antonio. Her father Juan died in 1982 during the Guatemalan Civil War. It is estimated that at least

    5, 000 Mayans in the Rabinal area were massacred in 1981-1982. Rosa is indigenous and belongs to the Mayan Achi ethnia.

    Ever since Antonio learned that Rosa wanted to name him Juan Jose’, he felt that was his real name.

    Jody and I supported Antonio’s name change, nudged him even. We wanted to honor his heritage and his birth mother. We understood how central a name can be to a person’s identity. Both of us have changed our names.

    A door opened. “All rise. This court is now in session. The honorable Judge Bernhardson, presiding.”

    Just minutes before, Crystel had each person, including her brother and his girlfriend say something they liked about her.

    What I witnessed that afternoon was two 13-year-olds asking for what they needed.

    They’ll do well in the world, I thought. If a person can identify and then ask for what they need, they can navigate the road ahead of them. Jody and I have taught our children well.

  • Renewing Passports for Children? Be Aware!

    Renewing Passports for Children? Be Aware!

    passport[1]

    I woke up startled. Filled with dread.

    “Jody, I didn’t make a copy of the kids’ citizenship papers.”

    I sank into our mattress. “Remember, we never did get Crystel’s green card back.”

    Antonio and Crystel’s citizenship papers were issued February 19, 2008. They were six years old.

    When Crystel was nine she asked me if I wished I were white or brown, or Mexican or American or Guatemalan. I knew then that it was time that she saw her citizenship papers.

    “You’re an American,” I told her. “You have a Welcome letter from President Bush.”

    “Do I have a green card?”

    2012 Lake Amatitlan, Guatemala
    2012 Lake Amatitlan, Guatemala

    “Well,” I said.

    Climbing Volcano Pacaya in Guatemala was easier than gathering the 20 documents that were required for her citizenship. Her green card was among them.

    I had laid the trail of documents on the floor because the table wasn’t large enough. I methodically checked off each requirement before placing the paperwork into the envelope to be mailed.

    Antonio’s train of documents was next to hers.

    Seems like losing government documents is not unheard of, maybe not even uncommon. When I explained to the Chicago Passport Agency that I didn’t receive Crystel’s green card back – which was a requirement for her passport – they must have believed me because they issued her a passport anyway for our first trip to Guatemala when she was 7.

    Lake Atitlan, Guatemala 2014
    Lake Atitlan, Guatemala 2014

    Now, it would be logical to think that once you received a passport for your children that when it came up for renewal you could just show the about to be expired passport.

    It’s never that easy.

    Antonio, Crystel, and I arrived at the government office. Waited for our turn. An hour later, I learned that I needed Jody there as well as birth certificates, citizenship papers, etc….

    While we were leaving one of the kids asked me why we needed Mama Jody. “So, they know that I’m not stealing you,” I told them.

    Getting two parents and two teenagers together at one time can be challenging.

    More challenging though and what will keep you up at night is if you don’t ask for a copy of everything that you turn over.

    It might not come back.